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Anxiety, stress, depression, Oh my

I’ve been real busy trying to get my research paper’s done. I’ve also been drowning in my anxiety and my stress levels are way off chart. I can’t stand that I’m an introvert and an empath. I feel exhausted and fatigued all the time. Add hypersensitive to that. I feel I’m spiraling into depression. 
I have so much on my plate, so what, in my right mind, made me think that I could add more? 
I know I’m doing good, but at what cost? With no help or support my kiddos often see an angry mom. I try not to be. I don’t know how much more of this emotional rollercoaster I can take. 
I can’t stand a lot of noise but I have no escape. I can’t stand the whinning, but I do whatever I can to make them happy. 
I worked for 3+ hours trying to get an official outline of my 10 page research done that would’ve been maybe an hours worth. And I’ve yet to finish it. It’s got to be turned in Sunday evening. 
During those three hours, I was constantly interupted by questions, wants, and tattle tales. This was right after supper so they weren’t hungry but yet asked for snacks, which I obliged. They had already had drinks but asked for more. Then there was the never ending tattle tales. And y’all already know I can’t focus for anything unless I’m left alone. It’s frustrating, to say the least.
I kept telling them that I’m doing homework, let me finish. I repeatedly asked them to go into the living room or their room until I’m done and they’d repeatedly come back. 
I hate feeling angry and  frustrated. I want to feel happy and relaxed. (I have many other vents that affect my moods but I’d rather keep them private). I just needed to complain. I’m sure there are far worst things that others are going through. It’s just, this is what I’m going through right now that’s hard.
This blog, my drawing, and my crochet are what helps a little but with the never-ending demands of my kiddos and all around household I don’t get much time with that either. 
I need a fishing trip all by myself. Yep, that’s what I need. Just me, a boat, and my fishing gear. Okay, maybe the kiddos would enjoy it too.
Whelp, that’s all for now. 
Until next time. . . 

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Mom | Wife| Writer/Blogger| Photographer | Student Hey y'all! I started this blog as a way to express myself and be creative. I really have no idea what I'm doing😞 I hope to have a better idea soon. I'm a student studying fine arts and creative writing. I love photography and I like putting short stories to pictures. I may also blog about personal schtuff! Just trying to get the hang of putting endless thoughts into understandable words. I'm a homeschooling mom of boys and wife to a retired combat veteran and within my writings you will find a little bit of everything. I'll share my thoughts and opinions, maybe some read worthy rants and recipes! So if you'd like to read about my random rambles grab your favorite liquid or snack, kick off your shoes (safely), have a seat and enjoy!

8 thoughts on “Anxiety, stress, depression, Oh my

  1. I get this, oh so very much, honestly. I am a hugely empathic person, prone to stress and depression. I fight the descent every day because I fear the fall into severe depression once more.

    I’m not going to patronise you, because you know the drill, but I will always advocate the importance of self-care and stopping every now and again. I know that’s not easy with the obligations you have and limited time, but try to find even five minutes every now and again for you.

    Self-care isn’t selfish; it make you stronger and better functioning, not just for you, but also for your loved ones. They will need to be told, of course as gently as possible, that you have to have that little bit of time if they want a parent, friend, partner, relative who is not going to lose it completely!

    Thanks for being so brave to post this. People like you break the stigmas down a little bit more.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I do try to take care of myself it’s just that my toddler is extremely needy. I guess you’d call it separation anxiety at this age? I can’t even go to the bathroom for a few minutes that he ain’t hollering and screaming ’cause I abandoned him! I know what it takes to keep from getting depressed but I feel so tired fighting it. Thank you for your kind and encouraging words. I’m gonna keep on keepin on!

      Like

  2. Eeeeps! If I had that much going on, I’d be snapping at everyone in sight! Like Nikki said, it helps to vent. Anytime you need to blow off some steam, we blog buddies are around to take the brunt of your frustrations 🙂 Good luck with your deadline!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m glad you decided to vent. It helps…even if it doesn’t feel like it. Keep your chin up and cut yourself some slack…you have a lot on your plate and getting frustrated is normal. Hugs to you and I hope you get that paper done soon.

    Liked by 2 people

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